Friday, February 13, 2009

The Twilight "Guide to Grieving"-inspired by Meadow Cliffdiver

Title: The Non-Twilighters (aka those who have never read Twilight)’s
Guide to Grieving

How to cope when someone you know reads Twilight

Introduction: Now, you may be wondering why you’re reading this book. Actually, probably not. You’re here because your friend, spouse, coworker, parent, or whatever else has been lost to what I like to refer to as “Twilight Disease*”.
Twilight Disease is the fastest growing disease in the entire world, and quite possibly the universe. However, you’ve probably already seen that in your day to day life. Oh, you’ll know if you have. If you have never experienced Twilight Disease first hand, you will my friend. You WILL.
There comes a time in a person’s life when they must choose: To read Twilight, or not to read Twilight. THAT is the ultimate question.
Well, I’m here to help you, NOT talk about Twilight. Except I kind of am, because in order to help you with your problem, I have to tell you all about Twilight.
I can’t remember everything I was going to say, so I’ll bring it up later in the book when and if I remember. So here’s a shout out to The League of Extraordinary Twilighters!

*Twilight Disease: The act of falling in love with all things Twilight, then talking about Twilight non-stop and telling everyone you come in contact with to read Twilight. This is real people.


  1. I can testify I'm one of those Twilight people, as well. I never knew the word 'meadow' would me so important to my life :) People may not understand. but if they don't, try to read the first 50 pages of Twilight. If that doesn't draw you in, then you're safe from being turned.

    Ninja Fanpire, you are a true vampire!

  2. NinjaFanpire, I love your explanation. My husband doesn't understand the Twilight Disease. I never thought I would like it, but now I can't stop thinking about it.